Consequences

[liralen]

Hmm...

Good thing with my meds: I can breathe. When I take everything on a strict schedule I almost feel like myself again. I rode a couple miles on my bike with the boys to Noodles and Company and while my lungs felt tight, they worked the whole trip. Jet pedaled away on the back of the three-wheeler and complained about how heavy I was on the hills. But I did just fine. I gardened a couple of days ago and got the tomatoes out into the garden, and I should probably get the zucchini and other stuff out, too.

So those are good.



Interesting things about the meds. My body and brain seems to be taking the additional adrenaline and stuff as stressor signals. And, for most of my life, that's meant that a deadline is approaching that I Must Hit. I used to call it my Death March brain and it was infinitely useful when I really was on the last legs of a project. It's not quite so useful now, and it's a really, really, really hard habit for me to break. *sigh*

And, no, it does NOT help for me to think that my old, stress puppy life style combined with ridiculous amounts of caffeine and sugar might actually have allowed me to breath. Though, yes, that morning cup of coffee does help.

Admittedly... in the last three weeks, with the half chapter I'm working on now (~3100 words), with half the 18k I wrote with stark_black, the 1700 words I've posted this week, and the 5500 words I'm saving for June, I've gotten about 19k words in three weeks or so. Not great, but not terrible.

It isn't helping that I actually do have deadline approaching for the spring_kink prompts, for all that they're self-imposed (okay and mildly socially imposed) deadlines. So I am having trouble getting off task once I'm on a task, even if I think I'm sucking at the task. I'm also having a really terrible time sleeping for more than six hours, because my brain wakes up at six hours and Will Not Stop. No matter how much I try to relax and try to close my eyes in the morning. It also doesn't help that the 8pm dose of Advair seems to wake me up and it's hard for me to get to sleep at all, and that's aggravated by having interesting things to do after Jet's asleep.

And then, today, I was really stupid and forgot the morning set of pills completely, and I've been in Terminator Turtle (Can't Stop Can't GET Anywhere) mode all day and it's frustrating the heck out of me, because I'm far too used to my brain working and working really well.

I have a doctor's appointment in the morning. I think this med set will work if I can cut the Advair off at night. I'm not having problems breathing at night, and I know that the inhalant is what's keeping me awake.

Balance. I need to figure out some balance somewhere. Cold turkey has worked in the past, as in when I went to Biloxi I just dropped everything and went, in a week or so, we're flying out to the Florida Keys for a week, and I'll pretty much drop everything. It'll be useful. Plus after this week Jet's on summer vacation so everything changes with that, too.

Comments

[thenomain.livejournal.com]

When I got my new meds for breathing, I had the unusual sensation that my lungs were capable of holding more air than my diaphragm is able to pull in. The feeling of open and empty lungs was both refreshing and disconcerting. One of those things that made me nervous, but now that my body has settled I kind of miss.

[liralen.livejournal.com]

Wow. I want that. *grin*

Mine are still oddly tight. Or something. I have to figure it out.

[r0ck3tsci3ntist.livejournal.com]

I can relate to your issues in a second hand way. My son has allergy related asthma as well. I pretty much just keep him inside between April 20 and May 20 when the trees are leafing. According to his allergy panel, tree pollen is the single largest culprit. The rest of the year he is very healthy so it's a real blow when suddenly in the spring he just can't breath. I know I need to get him lined up with allergy shots but the closest allergist has a very long waiting list. I need to do it though, he's finally asking for it. It sounds like your situation is quite a bit worse than his though, and he's one of the worst I've seen. You take shots but you still take meds... I was under the mistaken impression that the shots worked better than meds. *confused*

[liralen.livejournal.com]

That makes sense.

My panel hit hard on trees, all the grasses, and all the weeds, which means I'm out of it pretty much every season other than winter. There are reasons I like the snow. And even this last winter I was having problems, and we're not quite sure why. I am allergic to dust and dust mites even more than the dust, but in Colorado it's so dry there are no mites; and we have a house cleaning service that comes through every two weeks to keep the dust down. The HEPA filter helps.

Yes. Shots help better than drugs. They helped me immensely as a kid, I went from being unable to even do PE to actually being able to not just do it, but compete actively. Went from not being able to run a single lap to collegete fencing that took me to third place in the West Coast league. And then on to eight years of soccer... running 90 minutes two or three times a week. *grin*

This is an anomoly so far as my past is concerned. I've never had it this bad since I was a kid in LA with smog alerts every day. I'm not sure what's up, but whatever it is I wish it would stop.